I use to blog elsewhere, orgianal air date Feb2008
Disclaimer: When there is a need for a disclaimer you know it is going to get bad. I believe in women’s rights and personally view the purchasing of another human being as “not cool”. I do understand that there are cultural, political and religious practices that apply to marriage that are different than my own. This post is entirely tongue and cheek, mostly to satisfy rebuttal to the Fred Doll blog :).
I have a dear friend that I have always wished I could just materialize for him the perfect woman, right in front of him*poof*. Years ago I even set him up on a double with my best friend, I bet y’all had forgotten about that. I have been joking that he needs to look into the mail order bride business scandal. Pick up a catalogue, pick out a bride, grab a “learn to speak Swedish” audio set, and no problem. They could do a fund raiser at his work; sell tickets to the wedding to cover the cost of the overnight shipping. Who wouldn’t pay money to watch some foreign chick get in way over her head??? (Cheap shot, sorry man) Anyway – I figure like any other sale it’s the add on packages that seal the deal. In this case he asked for a gamer package. I smirked that damaging smile and went with it. I decided she would come with her own pink game controller for every system they make, fetch jolt cola on command, never walk in front of the tv, and can hook up surround sound. What a wicked sweet deal.
I ran this past my friend. He thought it was great. The only problem; he was going to have to get twins, one for his friend. We would hate for jealousy to come between two, ehhm, grown men. So be watching for that UPS truck, gosh I hope there is a this end up thingy on the box.